Oh! a few more observations from the wacky world of Petanque

Oh! a few more observations from the wacky world of Petanque

A.    Why did we play on that piste?

If you want to play on a certain piste it can be difficult to keep hold of it. Leaving your boule at the end can help as well as constant guarding of the piste by practicing. “Yes we are playing here” These people have not even organised their opposition let alone tossed. But, time is their ally as all the piste fill up. Now they find you and proclaim there is only one piste available. Well what a surprise! You win the toss and you have little choice where to play.  

B.    Why did he have a damp handshake?

Wetting a boule is something we struggle to understand in the UK. Most of the time we are trying to keep them dry and cloths and towels are standard equipment when the weather turns wet. The rules state clearly moistening of boules is strictly forbidden. So why would you do it. Many reasons, on a very dry fast pitch a damp boule will pick up grit from the surface slowing down the roll of the boule. I saw one player trying to explain to a player on his team to spit on his boule before he threw it,  his face was just hilarious but of course it has a darker and pretty unpleasant side. Shaking hands at the end is just a start. Yuk! Hands can get a bit clammy in the summer and a damp cloth will help cool and give a better grip on the throw.  I guess the other reason is a soaking wet handshake at the beginning of a game is not only disgusting but lets you know this guy will stop at nothing to win or put you off.   Now legal!

C.    He missed a couple and then really got into his stride and hit lots of boule. Shot us off the piste. How did they change their fortune?

Playing in the UK can be difficult and long intense games can mean a lot of standing around. Cold weather can mean stiff muscles and shooting can become a bit difficult. Shame to stand still getting cold, that shot you just missed with is sitting at the back out of play, shame to waste a moment of practise, after all no one will mind if I pick it up and have a couple of shots on the next piste. I might throw it again in the game but I will remember and after all I am not a cheat, I just what to throw some boule while they are measuring that close pair of boule.  I am getting a little stiff and missing a few key boule, what am I doing wrong. There sorted! Now on with the game.

I am not making this up it happened only two months ago against us

D.    How come we lost to that novice. Beginners luck I guess.

You always welcome playing new players and during the greeting and tossing of the coin you are told this is a players or the teams first competition, or they used to play a lot but have not picked up a boule for months. They soundly beat you as you try to think where you have seen them before. National championships maybe?

E.    Trouble focusing on the game. The jack is a little crowded

We all play for fun but some teams like to get a little closer to the action than you may like. It’s a bit rude to ask them to move even though they are only standing 3 ft from the jack. To be fair they do not move from the spot when their team are in the circle about to throw so why are you making a fuss. Because its against the rules! When the opposition are throwing. Now this is not cheating just irritating. Cheating is gaining an unfair advantage by operating outside of the rules. Ignorance is not really covered by rules but effective at putting the opposition off enough to win.

F.    Fussy git. At least they moved away from the jack after you glared at them.

You seem to be losing your line and cannot work our why. They have moved away from the head and are stood behind you. Sorry I am standing very close to you when you throw. I can’t be putting you off surely. If you bring your arm back you may hit them on the shin. Plus if they move you can hear it on the gravel. Works a treat.

G.   Beginners luck again. I really seem to lose to these people

The team have not been playing long and still have to master the required balance and poise in the circle. That lady is throwing on one leg but never mind she is new to the game and it cannot be doing any good as we all know you are going to be off balance. Well you may think that but you do not mention it and suddenly the jack goes out to 9.5 metres and this lady is pointing on the jack 2 out of three boule. The thing is distance may be a problem to this lady but when playing long jacks they will have an advantage. If you think this is not correct Boule Lyonaise players shoot boule up to 17 metres away on the run! Do not fall under the trap that because they throw on one leg you will have an advantage.

H.    Blimey how many short jacks did that team throw. They really need to sort it out.

Yes they played very well. A couple of jacks were thrown and the guy in the circle kept looking skywards  and putting his hand out with the picked up thrown jack. Just a minute did you check the length or did they do that to any short jack even though it is just over 6 metre A tut also helps pretend to show just how silly they were.

I.       Do you mind if we practise? Not enough room for you both so the team play four of five ends as you get cold and then proceed to thrash you.

J.     Drawing the circle with a stone. Handy that was there and of course it is tossed to the back. One less stone to get a kick off on the next end.

K.    Walking up to the head to get a better look standing looking puzzled and then walking back to the circle. The point floats through the air lands on the flat patch made by the player and rolls to touch the jack.

L.     Filling in the wrong hole, strange because actually it is always the right hole.

So we have given you some thoughts and warnings on gamesmanship but the only way to get the win is to play your very best. We are now going to look at aspects of the game with a series of practice ideas and techniques.